I created this page in the hopes of making it easier to sift through the collection of important and/or official documents, transcripts, letters, and images amassed by Mascara and Murder.
KNOWLEDGE IS POWER
"People are so stupid, Kar. Even if they bumped into you, they'd never know it was you, especially since you're supposed to be spending all your time in jail. They would never know. Just like if you came back to St.Cath. That would be the last place people would expect you to be, especially when I tell everyone you'll never, ever come back here.
See, that's my plan. People wouldn't know if it was you... People wouldn't know if it was you if they even had a conversation with you. People really are dumb. It's so easy to con people."
"I was exuberant until I realized that in spite of the things I had discovered this new book for which I had just signed a contract could not be written unless Karla talked to me. And frankly I was the last person on earth that she would ever talk to.
As she said in her first startling letter to me: 'Well, they say ‘never say never’ and they’re right. Never in a million years did I think that I would ever write a letter to anyone from the media, let alone you who has treated me so harshly.'"
Never has a person affected me so much. Always will there be something missing without you with me. My lawyer tells me we're ledgends. Ha, closer to immortality it would seem. Monday I'm being moved to Calgary *sadness*. I need to stay in contact.
Dear Jaxz,
I love you more than life, it's self. I've added you to my visitors list so once your released please visit after. Never forget how much I care or that I love you. We can keep visiting each other til we can be together again. Without you this life isn't worth living. *kisses* The thought of being with you is all that is helping me stay some what sane. We shall be 2 gether again I promise. Stay true to your promises and I shall to mine. Casey continues to lie. I wish I could hold u right now. Stay strong and continue to write me please . . . I need you. I love you, I miss you! *kisses* xoxoxo
your lover Jeremy
p.s. U said you want to get engaged? Then here's a Q . . . Will u marry me? If so, then it is a verbal agreement.
Greetings!
First and foremost, I grew up watching The Fifth Estate, and I think that your program is by far the best documentary series out there. Your entire crew is thoughtful, diligent, and the great amount of work they put into each and every episode is appreciated.
Now, on to my question... Why is perhaps the most well-known and revealing documentaries you have ever produced -- The Karla Homolka Episode -- not currently available for viewing online?
I couldn't help but notice that the video timeline seems to stop just short of the Homolka broadcast. There are conspiracy theoriests out there who would suggest there's a reason it's not on the menu :)
Archive: http://www.cbc.ca/fifth/archives05-06.html
Thanks for the great shows!
Exhibit 64
I love you with all my heart and no matter what happens please don't forget that people are lying, including Casey. I feel very alone. Stay strong. God I can't seem to write what I feel but I love you eternally. Try to hope, there is only so much bonds of flesh can do to the soul. kisses
[J.R.]
Exhibit 65
"There is only so much the bond of flesh can do to the soul!"
Dear Jaxz, *kisses* I'm sorry, I'm so very sorry, i love you with all my heart, and that will never change. [section whited out] I broke, I confessed. I'm sorry! I love you, I truly do . . . and I hope that one day I may be able to gaze into your eyez once again . . . I slept with your note in my hand every night, the only thing pushing me through this is the thought of you. I wish we could just go back in time and run . . . run far away and never look back. Never forget how much you mean to me or how much I love you! Without you I feel so empty and wish I could just die . . . no matter what I'm with you in mind and spirit, once this time comes, I hope to be with you in body too . . . keep this note close 2 your heart if I can write again I shall
kisses Jeremy
Exhibit 66
Dear my loverly Ba [indecipherable] te,
Please don't be sorry, I'm the one who needs to be begging your forgiveness. If only we ran, yes, but don't obsess on what could have been. In due time we shall have our castle. I am not whole without you. I love you with everything I am. I'll never stop and my promises shall be kept. However desolate it seems and shall become take it one day at a time. It can only get so bad before it gets better. I will be with you in spirit. I hope your doing allright, however large a task, please don't stress out to much. Having your sanity might be helpfull. More than anything I wish to be with you and hold you again. But until that time comes, know I love you.
xoxox (In joy and sorrow my sweet 666) Jaxz
Exhibit 67
Dear Cuddlebunny,
I'm sure that you are right, what's done is done. You need not ask for my forgiveness. Indeed, in due time our Empire shall be complete. Before you I was half and now that I am whole, I can't go back to being half. Your the one that I breathe, you're my moon when it breaks through the clouds at night, your all that I need. I long to feel your soft skin, I yearn for your kisses, for they could get me high. I hope that you stay true to your words. My entire faith has been bestowed unto you. With your words I shall remain strong, for you. Sometimes I have troubles sleeping at night, but I'm sure the thought of you before we get through the nights.
In due time we shall be together once again . . . but until that day arrives, stay strong, keep hope & have faith! I love you with all my heart and soul! Never forget that okay my love.
Til we speak again, xoxoxo Jeremy
Exhibit 68
Never has a person affected me so much. Always will there be something missing without you with me. My lawyer tells me we're ledgends. Ha, close to immortality it would seem. Monday I'm being moved to Calgary "sadness." I need to stay in contact.
[written by J.R.]
Exhibit 69
Dear Jaxz,
I love you more than life, it's self. I've added you to my visitors list so once your released please visit after. Never forget how much I care or that I love you. We can keep visiting each other til we can be together again. Without you this life isn't worth living. *kisses* The thought of being with you is all that is helping me stay some what sane. We shall be 2 gether again I promise. Stay true to your promises and I shall to mine. Casey continues to lie. I wish I could hold u right now. Stay strong and continue to write me please . . . I need you. I love you, I miss you! *kisses* xoxoxo
your lover Jeremy
p.s. U said you want to get engaged? Then here's a Q . . . Will u marry me? If so, then it is a verbal agreement.
Exhibit 70
May my heart become cold to all others.
Dear Jeremy, Ahahaha! I never thought I'd find myself hysterically laughing in a holding cell in these kind of circumstances . . . or ever really. But still! Ahaha you make me so happy! Yes! Yes! I will I would love to. Of course I'll come visit you'll have to find where you're being held. Ahaha god I'm so happy I must be happily insane then. Either way apparently I get a phyciatrist. Interesting information I came across. Anything you say to anyone including a phyciatrist, unless issued by a lawyer can be used against you for [expletive] sake. Rawr. The world really is against us. Do you have a lawyer yet? Do you know where your going in the near future? Oh I wish I could hold you and make you feel better! Argh I love you so much. I'm going crazy. Have you been in jail before? Ha I've counted and at times during the day a guard will come to "see if I'm okay" every 90 to 120 seconds lol
Oh did Casey happen to be in love with you?
We've been in the papers everyday apparently. I haven't seen them but hopefully can Monday. Everything related to me knows that I am in jail and what not, but don't know anything other than the charges and seemingly doesn't believe because my aunty says they still love me. Although it was as if I wasn't alive before. Oh remember that gift I had for you? It was a charm bag I had made for your well-being and such. You may think it's stupid but I put a unusually large amount of effort into it. I believe the planetary alignment and everything else that takes months to explain was correct so it's still helpful I suppose. I'll pray and reiki you. You will have no choice in the matter. In regards to the first time I snuck out, we're "safe." I want to be able to talk to you soo bad I have far to much free time alone, mixed with my fear of isolation. Well you're the only thing keeping me strong XOX
I have so much to say and contemplait but I'm going on here.
xox jazzy
Dreams filled with visions of us help us through.
The following is a letter from Jeremy that police never delivered to J.R. It was released to the public on November 20, 2008:
In Joy & Sorrow My Sweet 666
Dear [J.R.]
I'm glad to hear that you accepted my proposal. Smiles. And you make me incredibly happy as well. I too am going for psychiatric assessment. I'm not sure where I'll be yet, but I'll let you know. The world may be against us, but remember that nothing beats love. Just reading your letters and knowing that you care and are going to be there 4 me makes me feel better. Rawr. I wish we could speak on the phone or something. I love you more than anything in this world. I too though am going crazy without you. Every night I wish you sweet dreams and a goodnight...No I've never been to jail before. Yah I hear you about the guards. I've starting counting the holes in my roof and so far I'm upto 700 and I'm not [indiscernible] a foot away from the wall yet. lol. I'm not sure about Casey, but I think that she's obsessed with me...but I could care le - [indiscernible] about her, that stupid #*#**. If I [indiscernible] come at her I would lol. I've [indiscernible] heard stuff on the radio. No one [indiscernible] possible understand why or [indiscernible] love [indiscernible] Either way we can start our [indiscernible.] No I don't think that your gift to me is stupid. I think that it's [indiscernible]. I wish I could have it. As for my gift to you...I bought you a corset I wish that I could see you wear it. Sighs. In time I hope to give it to you like I said before I think that your gift is my thoughts. I pray to you and 4 you every night. The thoughts of you keep me strong. And I wish for nothing more than to just be with you. Do you think of the future? What do you see? I see you! Dreams filled with visions of us do help me.
XOXOXO Your Loverly Bastard Goodnight.
To: runawaydevil
From: {souleater}
Date: Wednesday, March 8, 2006, 2:36 p.m.
Subject: Haha!
God I can't get over not seeing or talking to you, I yearn to hear your soft suttle voice, & long to be held in your arms where ever that might be I don't care but just to share the time we have together with your are t die for and there is not anything that could ever replace the way you make me feel! :hearts: I miss you, I love you & I wish that we could just go somewhere we could jest be alone together for a little while... : ( or as long as you would like? I think tonight I'm going to write another song to you! :D won't that be fun especially seeing as you shall not read it or hear it till I see you next! tehee :rofl: well I guess I should go or something but I hope to hear from you much sooner than later! ttyl Cuddlebunny *hugz&kissez*
To: runawaydevil
From: {souleater}
Date: Tuesday, March 14, 2006, 4:30 p.m.
Subject: Re (2): Hey Sexy!
Aw so now that you've seen this poem what do you think? I'm glad that you miss me but I wish you didn't have to... :( But I guess the only way that is possible is by us being together indefinately right? :blush: It makes me so happy that Matt supports us in what we want to do together it's just 1 less person who we don't have criticizing us! :D I have a song in the midst of being written for you! I hope you'll like it too! & what of the vile of blood I gave you what are your words on expressing your thought on that item of my love to you??? Yay! when are we going to go get together & kill some more pitiful souls??? :nuts: well ttyl hopefully you can call or sumthin' & let me know what's up for 2morrow if I'm picking you up again or what's going on??? Take Care my lovely! :date: Love You! XOXOXO :love:
To: killmyheart
From: {souleater}
Date: Thursday, March 16, 2006, 9:22 p.m.
Subject: Re (8): No subject
What do you mean? I'm not quite following you! :imslow: well a certain somebody that i know along with it's toy & the whole point of killing them would be to start a spree across Canada! :rofl: kinda like the legendary Mickey & Malory love :love: birds! now have you seen that movie it's called "Natural Born Killers" it's the best love story of all time I loves it so much I wanna do it myself! :nuts: well I guess we'll see the cuz it's tomorrow! well ttyl! Cyz! :D
souleater: I was worried cuz she was getting in so much crap that we were going to have relationship problems, but she said she'd never break up with me and to stop worrying about it.
Super.Jesus: :( Tell her parents to shove it.
souleater: yeah right that will work... um we were thinking more among the lines of killing them :rotfl: yepperz & the best part is it was her idea! :D
runawaydevil: I miss you more than killing people. Can we get together and kill people?
runawaydevil: Rawr. I hate them. So I have this plan. It begins with me killing them and ends with me living with you...
souleater: Well I love your plan but we need to get a little more creative with like details and stuff.
* Transcript source: CanWest MediaWorks Inc.
“He yells at me, ‘Stab him, just stab him! Slit his throat!”
“I said, ‘I can’t, I can’t,’ and he said, ‘You have to. I did this for you.”
"Some time later one day Tooba told Sahar to come and peel some potatoes. Sahar told her sister Geeti to go and bring the potatoes. Tooba said [to Sahar], "You bootlick and fawn on others but will not come [to do my bidding]." She summoned Sahar to her and gave her a tongue lashing.
Later, Sahar come home and mixed the medicine Paizin, which is found in handbags for preservation, in some water and drank it. When I came home and saw what had happened I was very upset. I slapped myself and said, "Why do you want death? Why did you take medicine [to commit suicide]?"
Her mother said, "She can go to hell. Let her kill herself."
I said, "Why should she kill herself? Why did you give her to me in the first place? I don't want this to happen."
She said, "This will be the last day for you here."
I said, "You Paghmani, you can't kick me out. You are one wife of his, I am another."
She said, "You are not his wife, you are my servant."
Later Shafie came and I went to bed. The following morning Tooba had told him everything. Shafie was furious at me. I told him everything that had happened since Dubai. I said, "What is it that I am to blame for? What have I done?"
I saw that Shafie calmed down and went back. After a couple of days Shafie sat me down and proceeded to preach to me, telling me that I should try to get along with Tooba. He put the blame on me, even though I was innocent. Each and every time since Tooba entered our family, Shafie has sided with her, even when no blame attached itself to me. This sort of injustice I cannot put up with anymore.
I was so frustrated. I used to wander in parks and cry. When I returned home no one would speak with me except for Geeti and Sahar, furtively, when their mother was not there. It was very painful for me, very difficult. She wouldn't allow any of the children to sleep in my room. I always had to go out to call my family in order to calm down. Then I used to come back and prepare something for myself to eat.
Tooba and I would not speak to each other for some 5-6 months. Then one day, when it was my birthday, Tooba bought a cake and sent it to me by the hand of her daughter and I went to her to thank her. Thus, we reconciled.
The night before, IDENTITY PROTECTED had made us reconcile but we still wouldn't speak with each other. At this juncture, I told Tooba everything, how life was so difficult for me here, and expressed the hope that she would help me. She promised me that she would."
Source: CBC News
Fuck my parents. They are being so stupid. Only thinking of themselves. My father doesn’t even want us to have a wedding anymore. He thinks we should just go to City Hall. Screw that! We’re having a good time. If he wants to sit at home and be miserable, he’s welcome to.
He hasn’t worked except for one day since Tammy died. He’s wallowing in his own misery and fucking me! It sounds awful on paper (but I know you’ll really see what I’m saying).
Tammy always said last year that she wanted a forest green Porsche for her 16th birthday. Now my dad keeps saying: ‘I would have bought it for her, if I’d only known.’ That’s bull. If he really felt like that he’d be paying for my wedding because I could die tomorrow, or next year, or whenever?
He’s such a liar.
Dear Mom, Dad and Lori,
This is the hardest letter I've ever had to write and you'll probably all hate me once you've read it. I've kept this inside myself for so long and I just can't lie to you anymore.
Both Paul and I are responsible for Tammy's death. Paul was "in love" with her and wanted to have sex with her. He wanted me to help him. He wanted me to get sleeping pills from work to drug her with. He threatened me and physically and emotionally abused me when I refused. No words I can say can make you understand what he put me through. So stupidly, I agreed to do as he said. But something -maybe the combination of drugs and the food she ate that night- caused her to vomit.
I tried hard to save her. I am so sorry. But no words I can say can bring her back. I have thought many times of killing myself but I couldn't put you through the pain of losing another daughter and sister again.
I don't blame you all if you hate me. I hate myself. I live with the pain of knowing I unintentionally killed my baby sister every day. I think that's the real reason I put up with Paul's abusive behaviour - I felt I deserved it for allowing him to drug and rape my beautiful baby sister.
I loved her so much and never wanted to do anything to hurt my 'Tamiskins' please believe me. I would gladly give my life for hers. Nothing I can do or say can bring her back. I don't expect you to ever forgive me, for I will never forgive myself.
Karla
XOXO